When Serenity and I first moved to Wilsonville we started looking for a church to attend. We didn't have any kids then, and we had only been married for a year or so. My maturity as a Christian was infantile, and I was not allowing Christ to work in my life. I had many issues, the usual for any man, pride, sexual addiction, more pride, some father wound, you know, the usual. My theory when looking for a church was to find one that "fed" us. A body that spoke to us through strong teaching from the pulpit. The music and the worship that ensued meant little to me, and it played a very minor role in my equation to find a good church. Seren was nearly the complete opposite. It is the left brain / right brain argument. We probably went to 6 or 7 churches before finally settling on Grace Chapel, which has played probably the most significant role in challenging us to be more open to God, and allowing him to work in our lives. The relationships we have forged there are ones we will have for our lifetime. It is an awesome, God centered and loving church, and God definitely directed us to it.
During our search, we came across a little church we decided to give a shot one Sunday. That morning we had been arguing about, you guessed it, what church we should go to. We pulled up in the parking lot, still fuming and approached the greeter at the front door, who happened to be150 and on an oxygen machine. "Just a very eager elderly gentleman, press on, see what is inside," I told myself. As we made our way across the foyer, late all be it, the congregation stopped in the tracks to see these new (and young) attendees. We smiled and nodded as we walked into the sanctuary and quickly found a couple of seats in the pew two from the back. We were hands down, no question the youngest people by far on the church grounds. We joked later that the playground equipment was actually there just to trick younger individuals into thinking people of child bearing age actually attended the service. The congregation was singing "Kum ba ya." I am serious, no joke. It gets better though, the pastor, who was also leading the congregation in the hymn, continued singing and walked all the way back to where we were standing and pointed to the page number in his hymnal and then smiled and returned to the front of the sanctuary. After we completed the hymn, the congregation was instructed to be seated and then another hymn began. I leaned to Serenity and said "let's go." She said in a very pained expression, "we can't." I retorted, "are we going to become members here?" Not waiting for her response, I continued, "why sit through an hour and a half of agony when we could have 30 seconds of agony now as we leave quietly through the back doors." And at that, we walked out without making eye contact with anyone. I know, cowardly, but it was for the best, trust me. This story is one of the reasons why I believe God has a sense of humor.
Within two weeks we had found Grace Chapel and have attended ever since.
I'm not sure if that experience would be too much different today, but what I do know is that the Holy Spirit has worked in my life where I was at. If you draw closer to Him, He will draw closer to you. Time and time again, He has presented the opportunity for me to die to self and be renewed in Him. Time and time again, He has presented the opportunity to stretch my faith and trust in Him. Through all of this, He has given me freedom over sexual addiction, over the pain of a father wound, and begun to squash my pride under the weight and power of His grace, mercy and love.
No comments:
Post a Comment